(::The lot. JOANNE is reexamining the cable connections for the umpteenth time.::)
(::MARK::)
And so into the abyss...The lot. Where a small stage is
partially set up.
(::JOANNE::)
(::playing with some wires::)
"Line in"...
I went to Harvard for this?
(::MARK::)
Close on Mark's nose dive.
(::JOANNE::)
"Line out"...
(::MARK::)
Will he get out of here alive...?
(::JOANNE notices MARK approaching.::)
(::JOANNE::)
Mark?
(::MARK::)
Hi.
(::JOANNE::)
I told her not to call you
(::MARK::)
That's Maureen
But can I help since I'm here
(::JOANNE::)
I hired an engineer ...
(::MARK::)
Great!
Well, nice to have met you
(::JOANNE::)
Wait!
She's three hours late
The samples won't delay
But the cable --
(::MARK::)
There's another way
Say something -- anything
(::JOANNE (--into the mike--)::)
Test -- one, two three --
(::MARK::)
Anything but that
(::JOANNE::)
This is weird
(::MARK::)
It's weird
(::JOANNE::)
Very weird
(::MARK::)
Fuckin' weird
(::JOANNE::)
I'm so mad
That I don't know what to do
Fighting with microphones
Freezing down to my bones
And to top it all off
I'm with you
(::MARK::)
Feel like going insane?
Got a fire in your brain?
And you're thinking of drinking gasoline?
(::JOANNE::)
As a matter of fact --
(::MARK::)
Honey, I know this act
It's called the 'Tango Maureen'
The Tango Maureen
It's a dark, dizzy merry-go-round
As she keeps you dangling
(::JOANNE::)
You're wrong
(::MARK::)
Your heart she is mangling
(::JOANNE::)
It's different with me
(::MARK::)
And you toss and you turn
'Cause her cold eyes can burn
Yet you yearn and you churn and rebound
(::JOANNE::)
I think I know what you mean
(::BOTH::)
The Tango Maureen
(::MARK::)
Has she ever pouted her lips
And called you 'Pookie'
(::JOANNE::)
Never
(::MARK::)
Have you ever doubted a kiss or two?
(::JOANNE::)
This is spooky
Did you swoon when she walked through the door?
(::MARK::)
Every time -- so be cautious
(::JOANNE::)
Did she moon over other boys --?
(::MARK::)
More than moon --
(::JOANNE::)
I'm getting nauseous
(::They begin to dance, with MARK leading.::)
(::MARK::)
Where'd you learn to tango?
(::JOANNE::)
With the French Ambassador's daughter in her dorm
room at Miss Porter's. And you?
(::MARK::)
With Nanette Himmelfarb. The Rabbi's daughter at the
Scarsdale Jewish Community Center.
(::They switch, and JOANNE leads.::)
It's hard to do this backwards.
(::JOANNE::)
You should try it in heels!
She cheated
(::MARK::)
She cheated
(::JOANNE::)
Maureen cheated
(::MARK::)
Fuckin' cheated
(::JOANNE::)
I'm defeated
I should give up right now
(::MARK::)
Gotta look on the bright side
With all of your might
(::JOANNE::)
I'd fall for her still anyhow
(::BOTH::)
When you're dancing her dance
You don't stand a chance
Her grip of romance
Make you fall
(::MARK::)
So you think, 'Might as well'
(::JOANNE::)
"Dance a tango to hell"
(::BOTH::)
'At least I'll have tangoed at all'
The Tango Maureen
Gotta dance till your diva is through
You pretend to believe her
Cause in the end -- you can't leave her
But the end it will come
Still you have to play dumb
Till you're glum and you bum
And turn blue
(::MARK::)
Why do we love when she's mean?
(::JOANNE::)
And she can be so obscene
(::MARK::)
Try the mike
(::JOANNE::)
My Maureen (--reverb: een, een, een...--)
(::MARK::)
Patched
(::JOANNE::)
Thanks
(::MARK::)
You know -- I feel great now!
(::JOANNE::)
I feel lousy
(::The pay phone rings. MARK hands it to JOANNE.::)
Honey, we're... (::pause::) Pookie?!
You never call me Pookie...
Forget it, we're patched.
