Complimentary "What Do You Do with a B.A. in English?" Ringtone

Princeton: What do you do with a B.A. in English,
What is my life going to be?
Four years of college and plenty of knowledge,
Have earned me this useless degree.
I can't pay the bills yet,
'Cause I have no skills yet,
The world is a big scary place.
But somehow I can't shake,
The feeling I might make,
A difference, to the human race.

Kate: Morning, Brian.

Brian: Hi, Kate Monster.

Kate: How's life?

Brian: Disappointing.

Kate: What's the matter?

Brian: The catering company laid me off.

Kate: Oh, I'm sorry!

Brian: Me too! I mean, look at me! I'm ten years out of college,
and I always thought - oh...

Kate: What?

Brian:No, it sounds stupid.

Kate: Aww, come on!

Brian: When I was little I thought I would be...

Kate: What?

Brian: A big comedian on late night t.v.
But now I'm thirty-two and as
you can see I'm not.

Kate: Nope!

Brian: Oh well, it sucks to be me.

Kate: Nooo.

Brian: It sucks to be me.

Kate: No!

Brian: It sucks to be broke and unemployed
and turning thirty-three, it sucks to be me.

Kate: Oh, you think your life sucks?

Brian: I think so.

Kate: Your problems aren't so bad! I'm kinda pretty, and pretty damn smart.

Brian: You are!

Kate: Thanks! I like romantic things like music and art, and as you know I have a gigantic heart so why don't I have a boyfriend? Fuck! It sucks to be me.

Brian: Me too.

Kate: It sucks to be me

Brian: It sucks to be me, it sucks to be Brian

Kate: and Kate

Brian: To not have a job!

Kate: To not have a date!

Kate and Brian: It sucks to be me.

Brian: Hey, Rod, Nicky, can you settle something for us? Do you have a second?

Nicky: Ah, certainly

Kate: Whose life sucks more? Brian's or mine?

Rod and Nicky: Ours!

Nicky: We live together

Rod: We're as close as people can get

Nicky: We've been the best of buddies

Rod: Ever since the day we met.

Nicky: So he knows lots of ways to make me really upset. Oh every day is an aggravation.

Rod: Come on, that's an exaggeraton!

Nicky: You leave your clothes out. You put your feet on my chair.

Rod: Oh yeah? You do such anal things like ironing your underwear.

Nicky: You make that very small apartment we share a hell

Rod: So do you, that's why I'm in hell too!

Nicky: It sucks to be me!

Rod: No, it sucks to be me!

Kate: It sucks to be me!

Brian: It sucks to be me!

All: Is there anybody here it doesn't suck to be? It sucks to be me!

Christmas Eve: Why you all so happy?

Rod: Because our lives suck!

Christmas Eve: Your lives suck? I hearing you correctly? HA! I coming to this country for opportunities. Tried to work in Korean deli but I am japanese. But with hard work I earn two master's degrees in social work! And now I a therapist! But I have no clients! And I have an unemployed fiance! And we have lots of bills to pay! It suck to be me! It suck to be me! I say it sucka-sucka-sucka-
sucka-sucka-sucka-sucka-
sucka-sucka-sucka-sucka-suck! It suck to be me.

Princeton: Excuse me?

Brian: Hey there.

Princeton: Sorry to bother you, but I'm looking for a place to live.

Christmas Eve: Why you looking the way out here?

Princeton: Well, I started at Avenue A, but so far everything is out of my price range. But this neighborhood looks a lot cheaper! Oh, and look - a "For Rent" sign!

Brian:You need to talk to the superintendent. Let me go him

Princeton: Great, thanks!

Brian: Yo, GARY!

Gary: I'm comin' I'm comin'!

Princeton: Oh my God! It's Gary Coleman!

Gary: Yes I am! I'm Gary Coleman, from T.v.'s Diff'rent Strokes. I made a lotta money that got stolen by my folks! Now I'm broke and I'm the butt of everyone's jokes, but I'm here - the superintendent! - on Avenue Q.

All but Gary: It sucks to be you.

Kate: You win!

All but Gary: It sucks to be you

Brian: I feel better now!

Gary: Try having people stopping you to ask you "What you talkin' 'bout, Willis?" It gets old...

All: It sucks to be you on Avenue Q (sucks to be me) on Avenue Q (sucks to be you) on Avenue Q (sucks to be us) but not when we're together. We're together here on Avenue Q! We live on Avenue Q! Our friends do too! 'Til our dreams come true, we live on Avenue Q!

Princeton:This is real life!

All: We live on Avenue Q.

Nicky: You're gonna love it.

All: We live on Avenue Q!

Gary: Here's your keys!

All: Welcome to Avenue Q!

Complimentary "What Do You Do with a B.A. in English?" Ringtone